Skip to content

Everybody’s Stupid, LXXIV

Why did Keke Palmer have a baby by a man that she doesn’t respect? A while back, there was some bullshit circulation around the internet, about black women from specific cultures, primarily Islanders and modish “sheep”, suggesting that twerking on strange men shouldn’t be considered a violation in a relationship. The commiserating women declared that, because twerking is a dance widely accepted by most black cultures, shaking their asses while a random nigga’s dick is nestled between the crack of said asses isn’t necessarily cheating, and therefore they should receive grace after doing it. Obviously, those bitches are idiots! If you want to do hoe-shit, stupid bitch, just be single! That, or go find you a simp who’s comfortable loving a hoe. Again, I’ve never been in a committed relationship. And it’s because monogamy has always seemed like some idealistic, contrived, dictated, conservative, gratuitous nonsense, to me. Plainly, having an ingrained instinct to mate—along with the natural ability to be attracted to multiple people while being in love with someone—is reason enough to forgo commitment. In other words, a lot of people go against their intuition and attempt romantic exclusivity because they feel like it’s something they’re supposed to do. Remember, DMX had Brenda, LaTisha, Linda, Felicia, Dawn, LeShaun, Ines, Alicia, Theresa, Monica, Sharron, Nicki, Lisa, Veronica, Karen, Vicky, Cookie, Tonya, Dianne, Lori, Carla, Marina, Selena, Katrina, Sabrina, about three Kims, Latoya, Tina, Shelley, Bridget, Cathy, Rasheeda, Kelly, Nicole, Angel, Juanita, Stacy, Tracy, Rohna, Ronda, Donna, Yolanda, Tawana, AND Wanda! Yet, for him, that was probably just one summer of fucking. And if I weren’t me, that would sound like fun. I haven’t slept with a lot of women, and I’m proud to say that. First, I never want any easy sex! If a woman is fucking just because, she definitely lacks the level of self-worth that I require from my sexual partners. Second, I also possess a high level of self-worth. Even at my most comfortless and somber moments, I never felt worthless! Third, STIs can be fatal. No explanation needed there, right? Keke Palmer did some freak-shit with Usher in public, disdained her boyfriend’s very reasonable disapproval of her behavior, and now she’s rubbing it all in his face. In my opinion, that’s that bullshit! I don’t pay attention to most of popular culture’s scandals and tidbits, but a lot of this shit is unavoidable. For me, prestige doesn’t acquit iniquity.

If you’re in a dedicated relationship, you should never do anything to betray your partner’s trust, period. Again, if fraternizing is your avocation, you should find a partner who’s comfortable with you flirting with random people! From my perspective, being protective of your partner ain’t got shit to do with insecurity. Why would I want other people being sensual with or lustful towards my faithful partner?! Furthermore, wanting to fuck my lady, and seemingly trying to fuck my lady, are totally different things. Even being a predominantly invulnerable person, I would never want to ruminate on the thought of my unshared lover sharing their love with other people! In an exclusive relationship, sharing is daring. How? Because if you’re out there sharing my pussy, that’s like daring me to kill a motherfucker! What’s more, there are people out there who swear by not wanting a partner that nobody else wants to fuck. I presume the logic behind such a sentiment is based on a person not wanting their insecurities exposed if they are caught with a partner that other people find unattractive. Humans, y’all are stupid as fuck. Noticeably, different people find various things attractive. If you need everyone to approve of your mate, you’re a weak-ass person. And if you’re a weak-ass person, you’ll likely never be satisfied with anything. Because negative people are always going to have hateful shit to say. Do you know why? Because they’re weak as fuck, too! You’re all so unhappy because you’re obsessive about other people’s opinions. Without validation, many people feel invalidated. And that’s all due to your lack of self-confidence. Do you know what destroys people’s confidence the most in relationships? Cheating! Part of the reason why I reject committed relationships, is so I won’t have to worry about making a woman feel rejected or as if she isn’t good enough. Why would I tell a woman that I love her, and that I only want to be with her, and make her believe that shit, just to turn around and snatch all of her self-confidence and her confidence in me?! Your lives suck because you’re irresponsible, inconsiderate, inflexible, immature, and imbecilic! You’re liable for your partner’s feelings. Liability requires understanding, cooperation, and sound justification. You must be willing to oblige your partner’s needs and desires to preserve their faith in you and their contentment with you. Lastly, nothing will ever make sense—to anybody in the relationship—if you’re an adult who thinks and acts like a fucking child!

Ultimately, all relationships are the same. Whether it’s familial, platonic, romantic, or otherwise—everybody wants to be respected. And we wish for that respect to be reciprocated, right? While I’m making bitches pussies wet with all my eloquence and intelligence, let me help y’all wring those panties out. I’m about 5’9”—with shoes on. I look like AJ Johnson’s and Ving Rhames’ real-life son. I have bad eyesight, so I wear glasses—and the right lens is thicker than the left one. I would post a picture, but y’all will see me soon enough. My mustache won’t grow and my beard is a little spotty. Realistically, I’m a solid 7 out of 10—with a fresh haircut. But 9 times out of 10, I wouldn’t even fuck with you! Y’all bitches got life—fucked-up—out here. Every woman I’ve been with, as an adult, has been beautiful. I walk with a bop and my head high, naturally. I have a muscular build. And hoes try to throw pussy at me all the time. But I’m Dikembe Mutombo with the block! I’m Travis Pastrana with the swerve! And I ain’t even got no bubble gum for you hoes—RIP Big L! Ladies, y’all still want me? You should! And all the bitch-ass niggas out there, y’all still intimidated by me? You should be! When I tell y’all that I don’t give a fuck, I mean it. Confidence is the state of feeling certain about the truth of something, or a feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities. Remember, I’ve been me all this time. Do y’all think me revealing these facts makes me less confident? The way y’all think, you don’t think! Again, that’s why your lives are so dreadful. Wholly, I’m a better person than a good 90% of people. Additionally, all the shit that matters to y’all isn’t even pertinent to anything important. Diverging slightly—women, how many of your social media pictures don’t have a filter and shows you barefaced (without make-up)? Bitch, I bet it’s none of them! That ain’t even what you look like! I don’t fuck with social media because that shit ain’t for me. I’m not a fake person. And I don’t want a bunch fake-ass people in my business. How many of you feel obligated to be fake? Better yet, how many of you go to bed, every night, with a motherfucker that you never even liked, just because they aid in perpetuating your façade? So, y’all hoes don’t even want to be happy, huh? Deviating again—do you know how many bitches would leave their boyfriends for me, right now!? Do you know why I’d never fuck with a bitch who would leave her boyfriend for me!? You can smoke all the weed you want, but it’s not going to make you high-minded. And if your mind ain’t high, bitch, bye! I’m Beau Amoureux. And I just want everybody to know—we ain’t the same. Sorry.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *