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Everybody’s Stupid, CXVIII

According to reputable sources, including the National Institute of Mental Health, there are various types of therapies that aim to treat multiple disorders. But according to Charlamagne, venting and expelling soul-draining, repressed thoughts through communication “is not therapy” unless a therapist is present. Have you ever experienced relief, outside a therapist’s office, from simply expressing yourself? Do you believe that everyone needs to be told, by other people, how they feel and why they feel that way? Is It possible for people to recognize, for themselves, the source of their own distress, and for them to discover their own methods of overcoming said distress? How presumptuous are humans to believe that they know what’s best for everyone under all possible circumstances?! Get the fuck out of here! People don’t know shit! And people’s incomprehension of people’s ignorance is why everyone is so fucking ignorant. In essence, both a psychologist and a therapist are just humans who got certified for their jobs by passing tests. Remember, the rude-ass customer service bitches that we’ve all encountered at big-box stores got their jobs by passing assessment tests that are meant to rule out discourteous, despicable-ass people. There isn’t a college course on this entire planet that teaches people how to accurately read minds, and I don’t need a degree to know that is an indubitable fact! People can only understand as much as they can comprehend. And like I always say, passing a college course can be as easy as memorizing information that you may not even comprehend! At a recent Senate hearing, social media tycoon, Mark Zuckerberg, was censured by politicians for birthing a multimedia conglomerate that the government is attempting to hold liable for the untimely deaths of suicidal past users and the sustained diminishing mental health of despondent present users of his platforms. In addition, New York City’s mayor, Eric Adams, has officially declared social media an “environmental toxin” and a “public health hazard”. I couldn’t agree more with Mayor Adams. But obviously, no individual person or entity is blameworthy for social media’s inherent toxicity and permanently hazardous nature. Any place where humans congregate will always be filled with hate! And all the ruckus surrounding people’s apparently new-found repudiation of social media begs the question, how free do you want to be? On most established communication-based platforms, guidelines are set and enforced in efforts to mitigate the publication of undesirable content and harmful interactions. If the government decided that beauty filters and other digital enhancements are subversive to social media companies’ community guidelines and implemented a federal law prohibiting their use across social media, would that be fair? A better question is, how much capping is everybody on social media doing for the government to have to get involved?! Cappers, y’all ought to be ashamed of your-goddamn-selves! Essentially, y’all are capping on a criminal level! Conversely, I believe that beauty filters and digital enhancements give some people the extra confidence boost they need to dodge the deep depression caused by unrealistic beauty standards. But who creates beauty standards? In my opinion, unofficial societal standards are instituted by those who adulate an archetype. In other words, whomever people perceive as the epitome of something becomes the effective criterion. So, from my perspective, beautiful people don’t set the benchmark, it’s the people who idolize them. People’s personal insecurities evoke their feelings of inadequacy, inflame their hatred for more attractive people, promote their superficiality, embolden their pursuit of valueless likes and follows, and perpetuate the self-hatred that preserves their despondency. We can’t blame Erica LeShai for being so beautiful that black women envy her to the point where they refuse to acknowledge how indisputably intelligent she is. In the same way, we can’t blame the Kardashian sisters for having a naturally beautiful mom with “good genes”. There’s nothing that anyone can do to stop people from recognizing the differences between them and everyone else.

Have you ever been way too fucking high? Like, high to the point where you were absolutely positive you were dying? When people talk about bad trips, it’s always funny. But I can tell you from firsthand experience, it’s one of the worst things that can happen to you! A few weeks ago, I was puffing on my very legal THC vape and it kept clogging on me. To clear clogs, I usually apply suction at the mouthpiece of the vape until the air begins to flow again. But this time, the suction wasn’t working. So, I decided to hold down the power button to heat up the oil inside the vape, hoping that would unclog it. But instead of unclogging, the oil began to spill out the top of the mouthpiece. Being the frugal guy that I am, I didn’t want all that precious distillate to go to waste, so I decided to lick it off the top of the mouthpiece so it wouldn’t drip onto my clothes. That was literally the worst mistake I’ve ever made in my entire fucking life! A little advice, never do that. I knew I had consumed way too much of that shit because my throat was irritated and the oil was stuck to my teeth. Like any other edible, it took a couple hours for the effects to kick in. The high started out euphoric, but it didn’t take long for me to realize that I was getting progressively higher with every passing minute. Eventually, I lost all touch with reality. Being that high made me realize why the most potent form of THC is still illegal in most states, and I believe it should stay that fucking way! And with weed being such a popular, purportedly harmless, moderately medicinal, definitely addictive drug, I wonder how many suicides are caused by marijuana-induced psychosis!? If you’re depressed or worried, getting high—especially from an indica-dominant strain—is liable to amplify all your anxieties and self-doubt. But if you’re hopeless, and you ever get as high as I was in this instance, it’s over! Weed ain’t no joke, and neither is social media. Do you believe it’s possible for people to bully themselves? I believe that insecurities are oppressing, oppression is akin to depression, depression is a symptom of insecurities, and insecurities are a consequence of people beating themselves up about their natural imperfections. So, technically, people figuratively beating themselves up is equivalent to them actually bullying themselves, right? There was a time when I considered myself a pessimist because I couldn’t imagine a world where the future of mankind was bright. This is going to sound harsh, but where my pessimism was prompted by my acceptance of other people’s futility, other people’s pessimism is elicited by the acknowledgement of their own futility. And if social media serves any purpose, it gives a lot people the ability to discover a purpose. Whether they want to share their experiences, make people laugh, find friends, promote their businesses, learn something new, entertain themselves, etc., social media is a well-needed distraction for a lot of doom-mongers and defeatists. And if you’re a woman and you want to feel better about yourself, all you have to do is go on Instagram and TikTok, search for the top models, and see how many insecure women modify their bodies to the point where they are virtually unrecognizable. Again, this is going to sound harsh, but none of those BBL bitches were confident before the surgery. Even Kim Kardashian’s ass is fake! If it’s standard for women to make synthetic and simulated sexuality normal, maybe nonstandard should be the new standard? As a man, I can tell you that I’d prefer a natural little booty over a big, fake-ass booty. What’s wrong with variety? Why do women believe that men want all women to look alike? If people can’t accept you for who you are, they’re not for you.

When you can tell yourself the truth, what can people tell you? If you believe that humility is advantageous to people’s wellbeing, then you may see self-deprecation as positive method of achieving self-acceptance. And if you’re beating yourself up about your natural imperfections, but you still function every day and find a reason pick yourself up, then it’s possible that those imperfections aren’t as important as you’re making them. We’re all our own worst critics. And because we often see ourselves from a hypercritical perspective, it’s easy to overlook all the qualities and strengths that we have. I could never tell you why bitches like me so much! I ain’t all that, at all. But you would never know that I believe that just by observing me because I don’t hate myself. I understand that for every woman who doesn’t find me attractive, there’s one who does. And because I’m not trying to associate myself with every woman in the world, I don’t need over 4 billion women to find me attractive. If you care about everyone’s opinion of you, what exactly do you expect to come from those favorable opinions? Do you want everyone to kiss your ass? Do you just desire good vibes everywhere you go? How extreme are you willing to get to acquire acceptance? Do you think it’s healthy to people-please? Self-sacrifice is the lifeblood of social media! Most of the successful and reliably consistent influencers on the internet embellish for a living because things that seem too good to be true are the most appealing to people who wish they could live a dream. There are people out there who dedicate their lives, putting everything on the line, to stay relevant in the algorithm. And there are even more people who practice self-denial with unrelenting commitment and never achieve any level of relevancy whatsoever! So, why are you on social media? I think that’s a question everyone should ask themselves today. If you’re not selling anything, if you’re not networking, if your page isn’t private and for real-life family and associates only, if you enjoy your privacy, if you don’t give a fuck about likes and follows, or if social media doesn’t benefit you enough, I think it would be prudent for you to consider deactivating your accounts or restricting what you share. When I was in my early teens, I met this girl who lived in Pennsylvania on AIM—AOL Instant Messenger. We ended up becoming pen pals and she would write me handwritten letters all the time. I still have every letter to this day. In one of the letters, she talked about how she wanted to put peanut butter on my dick so she could suck it for a long time—because peanut butter is thick and it takes a while lick off. This may be too much information, but I read that shit and my little dick stayed hard for like three straight hours! Those were the good old days. Nowadays, bitches don’t leave anything to the imagination. And these bitches’ bodies ain’t even real! What does a BBL even feel like? Is it lumpy and stiff or does it feel like real cheeks? I really want to know, but I digress. Artificiality shouldn’t be perceived as reality because it doesn’t occur naturally. At a minimum, if you aren’t completely happy with who you are but you haven’t made any permanent alterations, you’re a real person. And if that statement offends you, I apologize. If I had an opportunity to trade places with anyone, I wouldn’t take it. I’m Beau Amoureux, why the fuck would I want to be anybody else!? Find the Beau Amoureux in you and embrace it. Peace.

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