“Go to school is what you tell us! But niggas in school is scared of the Goodfellas! We got the yayo, you can just say no! But nobody makes a fuckin’ move until I say so! That’s how it is, that’s how it’s gonna be! Kids, when you grow up, who the fuck you wanna be? Like me, your black superhero!” For the record, it’s certainly no coincidence that hip hop and hypocrisy sound so much alike. A contradiction is a comment, concept, or conundrum with opposing components. For instance, the often ostentatious O’Shea Jackson regularly, repetitively recites rhymes with confusing contexts and ridiculous refutations that suggest he’s merely making up shit for the fuck of it. In the aforementioned song snippet, the always angry, adamantly argumentative, alarmingly aggressive “nigga with an attitude” asserted that kids should skip school, venerate villains, do drugs as they’re held hostage, and follow in his foolish, felonious footsteps. Or did I mostly misinterpret such simplistic stupid shit? “Everywhere we go, they say, ‘Damn!’ NWA’s fuckin’ up the program! And then you realize we don’t care! We don’t just say no, we’re too busy sayin’, ‘Yeah!’ About drinkin’ straight out the ‘8’ bottle! Do I look like a motherfuckin’ role model?!” Make up your motherfuckin’ mind, mister! Remember when I said that God is making a mockery of nonsensical niggas and nobody near said niggas notices? Well, that’s nothing new. And again, I am your karma incarnate! Time’s ticking thugs and thots, what y’all gon’ do? Panicking and praying for God’s grace after all that intentional immorality, salacious sinning, deliberate debauchery, and various violations of God-given guidelines may or may not make matters more entertaining for the controversy-craving consumers of the inimical, injurious industry of indecency and ill intentions. Y’all wouldn’t believe how much music and how many movies were made with messages meant for me—the shining savior—specifically. I’ve always felt this fiery fury deep down inside me, seemingly suppressing itself like it knows better than to emerge early or prematurely present itself. That may seem silly to some, but it’s totally true. When the time is right, I’ll reveal what super surprising sign God gave me to substantiate my supposition about said secret suspicion. And forewarning, it’s absolutely awesome! When perceived positively, an adult’s “inner child” represents their curiosity, creativity, cheerfulness and child-like aspects of their personality. As a mature male, my inner child isn’t necessarily noticeable until something super surprising happens. Which queues the query, do you believe in magic? I’ll come back to this sometime soon. Anyhoo, I was watching “Dragon Ball DAIMA” on the treadmill earlier, and there’s this crazy character named “Vegeta,” who’s often very violent. In this exciting episode, Vegeta, who was cursed and turned into a child—along with his anxious, agitating allies—by vindictive villains vowing to rule restricted realms, was riding with a gregarious guide who daringly disrespected Vegeta by asking Vegeta’s wife to be his girlfriend. The gregarious guide shot his shot, Vegeta said, “That’s my wife!”, and the guide said, “I don’t mind sharing.” Y’all, I’m so mature, even though that riling repartee was funny as fuck, I immediately wondered what the real-life ramifications and repercussions would be for the disrespectful dummy dicking around with a savage “Super Saiyan.” Then, subconsciously, I thought of someone specific, and it annoyed me a little—because why? Girl, get out of my high and holy head, dang! Beau’s bitches, be honest, y’all get jealous when I name names, don’t you? I can see that shit on your faces! Even the married misses, and you know who you are. How many relationships have I ruined just by being better at authenticity than your previously preferred partners? Is it my fault that niggas is bitches? Niggas, you’re welcome for the wet work, *wink, wink*! And that little shit y’all are trying with the damsels in distress ain’t gon’ work! Returning readers, remember, whenever you don’t know what I’m talking about, it’s because I’m not talking to you. Duh! Big-headed beauty from the punk-ass podcaster’s previous posse’s podcast, sup? I hope your depression dissipates and your new dream career brings big bucks and desired success. And as Chocolate Christ, consider my well wishes a blessing. I tried to watch your vlog, but the sad shit was making me sad. Unfortunately, Beau’s bitches, there’s only one me. So, you should see settling for less as an inevitable, inescapable outcome if you’re waiting for someone similar. Alternatively, we can be one huge, happy polygamous party of lovers. Nah, I’m just joking… unless you gon’ do it! Because soon…
Omniscience